A New Song, Called The Political Dance

I knock?d my last pipe out, and stepp?d into bed,
It was twelve, or at least pretty near,
When the strangest concert found a way to my head,
And thus Fancy begun her career:
My mind all the day had been thinking of France,
Of her fleets, and her armies on shore,
So I dream?d that all nations stood up for a dance,
Such a dance as was ne?er seen before.
Sardinia, Germany, Prussia, and Spain,
Was the foremost that jigg?d it away;
Then Old England stood up, bid them play a bold strain,
And the Holland they all danc?d in the bay.
They join?d hand in hand, they all danc?d in a ring,
France caper?d and kick?d in the middle,
But so quick was the tune that she snapp?d every string,
And she broke down the bridge of her fiddle.
Tho? the figure was chang?d, she still flourish?d her toes
I ne?er saw such work at a ball;
France took out her snuff-box, and turned up her nose,
Saying, ?Here?s face to face to you all.?
She jaunted and footed, and frisk?d at the Nile,
She there danc?d her best, I must own,
All the company said she advanced in good stile,
But again she fall back in Toulon.
Such dancing must harras poor mortals to death,
I remark?d how each strove for renown,
But Holland declar?d she was quite out of breath,
And, without asking leave, she sat down.
Poor Prussia, fatigu?d, was the next to begin
In proposal to finish the rout;
The Spain started back saying, ?If Prussia give in,
I am sure it is time to give out.?
I dream?d there must now be and end to the fun,
And no other feats will be shewn,
And at length all the dancer dropp?d off, one by one,
And left England and France all alone.
But again they went at it ? each cried, ?Play away;
Come, fiddlers, strike up to some tune:
But Old England?s steps were so vig?rous and gay,
That I thoug she?d leap?d over the moon.
She danc?d at the Nile, but in Egypt, good lack!
My dream was pit into a flurry,
France made a false step, and fell flat on her back,
And I thought she?d not rise in a hurry.
Well, I laugh?d in my sleeve, as she sprawl?d on floor,
When I saw her kick up both heels,
There was Russia and Turkey bounc?d in at the door,
And with England was dancing Scotch reels.
Well, I thought I had got all the steps to a charm:
Nay, while sleeping I cried out, ?I?ve got ?em.?
I gave my poor wife such a thump on the arm,
That she wak?d me by slapping my bottom.

Back to artifact